It's been a while since I've blogged, and it's because I've been having so much dang fun living and exploring our new dynamic.
Let me take you back a few weeks to my podcast recording with Alexandra Stockton.
My plan was to focus solely on her Uncompromising Intimacy theme, and what happened was in-real-time-coaching for me.
The week before, my partner Scott had asked me to choose: Him or another couple we'd starting seeing.
This sounds super dramatic - but basically they'd asked for a dynamic that we don't currently have, and wanted to explore further than he was comfortable with.
I'd hit Scott's boundary line and it brought up a slew of emotions to process between the two of us.
He was not comfortable with the dynamic they requested (they wanted to date me exclusively), and that's where the request for me to choose came in.
I broke it off with the couple, and chose him.
Simple as that.
Do I still love and care about them?
1 million percent.
Is my relationship with Scott more important than any other relationship I have?
Do I want to be in partnership with him long-term?
I tell you this very transparent story because I want you to see that opening can be messy. Especially until you get into the groove of it.
Give yourself and your partner tons of grace.
There are 3 steps forward and 5 steps back.
There's redefining what we both want.
Making sure the other person is on the same page.
Readjusting the pace.
So I readjusted and took a step back to get back on the same page with my partner.
Once on the same page, we waited a few weeks to calm our nervous systems.
To get back into sync.
To redefine our dynamic.
What's a Dynamic?
A "dynamic" in the Lifestyle is a term used to describe how you and your partner are willing to engage with another person/people.
We posted different dynamics over on my Instagram page: HERE.
As we decided we were ready to open up again, and very slowly, we decided that we'd like 2 different dynamics:
1. We wanted to date a couple for soft/hard-swapping activities.
I've got Scott's full permission to hard-swap with women. Soft-swapping with men. And at this point it's like soft-soft swap.
2. We wanted a woman to share in a hard-swap dynamic.
I want to play with her. I want to watch him play with her. We want to take amazing care of her together.
And within just a few weeks, we found a couple at the starting point - just like us! Our dynamic is the same. And we've enjoyed dating each other, and getting to know each other, slowly.
We also have found a woman to date, and have spent time getting to know her, ask fun, intimate, questions, and are preparing for our first intimate encounter.
Next, I'll blog on how we attracted in the partners we desired.
Dating and manifesting ideal partnership is one of my very favorite topics!